Selling Out a Friend

Intentions, Outcome, and Regret

We may be the protagonist of our own story but that doesn’t mean we are always the hero. There may be moments when we are not necessarily the villain but our actions and words can be considered questionable. I’ve had my share of these questionable moments throughout the years (moments when I was less than heroic). One such moment found its way into my thoughts while drinking a second cup of coffee the other morning. I got to thinking about an old acquaintance, the moment I sold him out, and regret.

Many years ago I inadvertently got mixed up in some workplace politics. The particulars of the event aren’t too important, but it’s important to know that two clear sides were drawn and there was no room for neutral viewpoints. I found this out when I was called to the conference room and found the manager with a representative from the district human resources office. Big Don, the manager, showed me a list of employees who signed a petition stating they refused to work with a man who, at the time, I considered a friend. Hell, at least a half dozen people who signed the petition considered the man a friend. Don informed me that I had to give a formal statement to the HR representative concerning certain rumors I heard. I had every intention of defending my friend but the outcome of the meeting was clear before I started talking. Decisions had been made. My statement was a formality. Even so, I couldn’t help but feel as if I was selling out a friend as I gave my statement.

Over twenty years have passed since that day. Now and again I regret how I handled that event. But the regret isn’t that I told Don and the HR representative the truth. I felt bad for my friend and I felt I sold him out, but I never regretted telling the truth. To this day I regret that I remained friends with some of the people who signed the petition.

-K-