Where is Winter?

or How Winter Has Become Kind of a Jackass  

Damn near 55 degrees on the drive home today. I had the windows down, the radio up, and was appreciating the weather when those all too familiar red and blue lights of the Illinois State Police lit up behind me. This isn’t going to be a journo about the $164.00 stocking stuffer that I’m giving to the state of Illinois. Sticking with the topic of winter, I want to tap out a few lines about the indecisive weather here in the Midwest.

We’re into the second week of December and I could have worn short sleeves to work today. There is talk of snow in the forecast for this Saturday (a week of ago the forecast for today was the low 40s) but a few flurries does not mean the arrival of winter. And this delay, this waiting, this wondering when winter will finally show up makes its arrival all the more difficult. It’s hard to lean into winter if you don’t when it will show up. Old Man Winter used to be a pretty reliable guest. You knew he was coming, he showed up on time, and left when he wore out his welcome (give or take a week or so). Now, winter is more like one of those jackass phone solicitors telling you your car’s warranty is about to expire. You don’t when he is going to call, when he does call it’s at inopportune times, and he even though you block his number he never really goes away (not my best metaphor but I’m thinking of selling my good ones to pay for the ticket).

Winter in part of living in the Midwest and it is something that I’m used to. What I am not used to is the thought of wearing flip flops in December (unless I plan on going back to Mississippi). So Old Man Winter, wherever you are hiding, quit acting like a Jackass and show up, do your thing, and leave once you’ve worn out your welcome. Oh, and do you have a hundred bucks I can borrow?


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